Thursday 19 April 2012

To love or not to love – Philosophy for a donkey


I have a considerably good mind, often donkeys consult me. But it’s been ages since even a donkey has sought advice from me; so here I am, trying to keep myself happy by giving some advice to myself. I must add however, this has become somewhat ad nauseam of late, but that won’t deter me, at least for now.

I have enjoyed being in relationships; I have been somewhat lucky with them as well. I might not be constant in love, but I end up being constantly in love. If they work out, I am happy, if not, I end up being some sort of a philosopher. Either ways, things work out for my good.

However happy-go-lucky types I might seem to be, I do have a serious side as well after-all. And I must point out that laughing faces doesn’t mean that there is an absence of sorrow, it means that they have the ability to deal with them.

I think the key to remain happy is probably not to take anything too seriously, and that includes relationships. At least not until you’re married.

I believe in the school of thought that says women fall in love by what they hear. Men fall in love by what they see. That's why most women wear makeup and most men lie. 

Most people invariably have a proclivity towards some sort of an emotional consistency. I might seem to espouse Sigmund Freud's philosophies that the primary motivation for all things in life is sex, but like Bob Dylan puts it - "Love is just a four letter word". And in the words of Chris Rock - "A man is only as faithful as the choices he has."

A lot of people who get into relationships often ignore everything else, including their best friends and family, accentuating the cliché that love is blind. And things get worse when a relationship fails. To me a break up is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it. If you can’t save a relationship, at least save your pride.

However cynical I might sound, I must admit that people are bound to have broken hearts, simply because the ideologies of people have changed of late. Things are to be used and people are to be loved, but the problem now is that people are used and things are loved. Try breaking a cell phone for instance of the one you love, and you’ll know exactly what I mean.

When we meet someone for the first time, they are at their affable best. What this results in is that people generally form a good impression about the other person because of the way he or she presents himself. Later when people get to know each other better, things might not seem quite the same. Often fights follow as well. What I generally do in this case is to rate people as 0 on a scale of 0 – 10 and when you get to know the person better you can enhance the rating accordingly. That way you will not get hurt if the person disappoints you later as you already do not consider them worth the bonding. This I learned from a friend, (Prithvi) and I continue to follow it. Also when I meet someone initially, I tend to portray a negative image of myself and then build on it for good. This helps as the person is aware of your bad aspects before your positive side (please don’t do the same during interviews and other formal engagements though).

 I read somewhere that no man or woman is worth your tears & the one who is, won’t make you cry. This might at least help in making better choices for the ones who can’t live without the emotional consistency.

Having expressed myself, you may abide by what I said and follow suit, but if you do not agree with me, you should know what I meant when I said initially that often donkey’s consult me.


P.S. - This was written for a friend of mine who in depression due to some relationship issues. I've borrowed a lot of phrases from here and there, but at the time of writing, my only intention was to try and bring a sense of calm in her mindset.